Post by jka on Dec 12, 2006 18:51:08 GMT -5
I had the blessing of being brought up in a family where we went to church each Sunday, and as far back as I can remember I had a knowledge of God. I was raised in church (baptist, brethren, methodist, non-denominational and others) and can count on one hand the Sundays I haven't been in a church. My father professes to be saved but I do not know as in the whole 21 years of my life I have never heard how he got saved, and he has gotten much looser over the years. He does however talk about his christening, and I hope he isn't trusting in that. My granddad was a methodist evangelist in Australia. My mother is saved. I got baptized when I was ten years old, but I was not a Christian, as none of these things make a person a Christian. All my friends at the time were getting baptized, so it was the in thing at the time and that's why I did it. My heart was not right with the Lord.
After my false baptism, I kept up appearances and for the most part I was pretty good at it. A lot of people were deceived into thinking that I was saved. I knew all the right Christian lingo and how to behave. But I was like Judas – I pretended to be a disciple of God while really going my own way. I was a pretender, a fake. I was living a lie and I was absolutely miserable.
I have always been an avid reader of books and at the age of thirteen I read a book about hell. This scared me and I prayed the prayer at the back of the book, but it was because I wanted fire insurance against hell than any real desire to repent of my sins and let God change me. For the next few years I continued as a fake Christian. I was a religious pharisee. I was involved in the Sunday School, creche and music ministries in my church but it was more in order to glorify myself so that everyone could see how good I was.
Throughout my teenage years I began to be tempted in ways I had never yet experienced. I began to play in the pigpen with the world. I got involved in wicked and vile things and started exploring satanism and witchcraft. I began to drink and hang out with the wrong friends. I had many worldly boyfriends and there are a few times when I actually went purposely to seduce a guy, and it's only by the grace of God that each time God intervened. (God does not usually do this and I have no idea why He chose to do this for me but I will be forever grateful). I also ended up fooling around in lesbianism. I haven't shared that much before. I was known also as the biggest liar most people have ever known. I survived high school only by cheating my way through. I had kept from these things previously for fear that people would find out I was a hypocrite, and that I would break my parents heart. But the temptations were so strong that soon these things were not strong enough motivations to keep me from wrong. I was set on going my own way and I was headed for destruction. The thoughts of my heart were wicked continually. God began working in my heart and began to convict me of my sin.
About this time I went to Camp Benaiah in Ingham, like I had every year since I was ten. My parents hadn't made me go and I only went because my friends were going. My whole motivation for going to camp was to show everyone how cool I was. Just before I got on the bus for our three-hour trip, God convicted me about this. I bowed my head in the church carpark and asked God to speak to me at camp. I had been at camp a day when God convicted me of being a phony. I sat in a secluded spot, just God and I alone. It was there that I told the Lord that I had sinned. I repented of my sins that day and life has been different ever since. From that day on I was a new creature. Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new. 2 Corinthians 5:17. I still struggled with my past sins but I didn't enjoy them anymore. I had a new motivation to do right. I was a redeemed child of God, and this is the greatest motivation. I began to show evidence of salvation in my life. I was growing in the Lord, and there were times when God was chastening me, and He only does that to His own children. I am now confident of my salvation. Praise the LORD!
When I got saved I was in a church that although it was Baptist in name, was not Baptist in doctrine. The pastor would even admit that he wasn’t a Baptist. So I had a lot of wrong teaching. Well when I turned eighteen, I moved out of my parents home for the last time. I had lived in and out of home since I was sixteen.
After a while I realized that in the church I was in I was in a spiritual rut. Through lack of discipleship I was still involved in many of my pre-salvation sins. So I moved about 900 kilometres south of where I was. It was not long after here that I found out I had no chance with the man that I thought I had loved for the past two years, and that I lost all my old friends in one fell swoop. I was devastated, because I could not see at the time that it was God breaking off old ties so that I could start anew. From sexual abuse as a small child to the way I was treated by boys and men as I grew up, I decided that all men were bad and went back to my sodomite lifestyle. It was at this time that I tried to take my own life for the last time. I had been suicidal all throughout my teenage years but this was the last time I attempted. Well the Lord delivered me from myself.
Not long after this, through a stupid choice I made, I became homeless. I lived in a shelter for homeless youth. I was there for three months. I see now that the Lord had me there to show me what He had delivered me from. It was about this time that God really began to work in my heart about living a separated life. Up until I moved to this new town, I had thought that separation was for fools that were afraid of the future. But I see now that the fool was me. I did get into trouble while living in the shelter, and yes, I was God’s child and so He began to discipline me. I did not enjoy getting into trouble like everyone else did. I was involved in things like lighting fires, graffiti, shoplifting and things of that nature. But I did not enjoy them. It was while I was in the shelter that I stopped doing this and decided that yes, the Lord had been good to me and I was serious about serving Him and I wanted to fully commit my life to Him.
Missionaries in my church took me in to their house when the homeless shelter kicked me out. It was at this time that I repented of sodomy and asked the missionaries to help me, and they did. They still let me live in their house knowing what a vile sinner I was. It was in my three months at their house and the few months afterwards when I moved into the college here in my town that the Lord began to reveal His plan to me. I had gotten my heart right while living in the shelter, and He was now ready to take me to the next step. God began to speak to my heart in very distinct ways, through preaching and music and many other things. I did not want to serve Him in a full time capacity. I just wanted a job and stability. I fought the Lord for a while. There is a song that I’ve heard before that is called “Lord, Please Don’t Send me to Africa.” That was me! I was afraid God was going to send me to Africa or some other remote place. Then one day I came to the end of myself and I told Him that I loved Him and would do whatever He wanted, even go to the centre of Africa, if He so desired. After I surrendered, He began to show me quite quickly what He wanted me to do. He laid a burden on my heart for the USA. I had never even desired to go to the USA. I thought that God was crazy and I didn’t want to go.
God did have a ministry for me in the USA. Through unusual means (I met my husband on the internet) He had me marry a man from the USA and my full time ministry is my husband and my children if God desires to bless us with them and I hope He will! God gave me a man that looks beyond my past and sees who I am today.
My husband is a wonderful man and I’m so glad the Lord saw fit to let me marry him. Jordan is a wonderful ministry to have! I get to serve my husband with joy and also get to serve as God sees fit in my local church.
The stories that I write a lot of them are things that I have personally seen or experienced or know someone who has experienced them.
What a wonderful change in my life has been wrought, since Jesus came into my heart!
~ Katy-Anne Wilson
(I write a lot of short stories so I kept the bit about the stories in there).
After my false baptism, I kept up appearances and for the most part I was pretty good at it. A lot of people were deceived into thinking that I was saved. I knew all the right Christian lingo and how to behave. But I was like Judas – I pretended to be a disciple of God while really going my own way. I was a pretender, a fake. I was living a lie and I was absolutely miserable.
I have always been an avid reader of books and at the age of thirteen I read a book about hell. This scared me and I prayed the prayer at the back of the book, but it was because I wanted fire insurance against hell than any real desire to repent of my sins and let God change me. For the next few years I continued as a fake Christian. I was a religious pharisee. I was involved in the Sunday School, creche and music ministries in my church but it was more in order to glorify myself so that everyone could see how good I was.
Throughout my teenage years I began to be tempted in ways I had never yet experienced. I began to play in the pigpen with the world. I got involved in wicked and vile things and started exploring satanism and witchcraft. I began to drink and hang out with the wrong friends. I had many worldly boyfriends and there are a few times when I actually went purposely to seduce a guy, and it's only by the grace of God that each time God intervened. (God does not usually do this and I have no idea why He chose to do this for me but I will be forever grateful). I also ended up fooling around in lesbianism. I haven't shared that much before. I was known also as the biggest liar most people have ever known. I survived high school only by cheating my way through. I had kept from these things previously for fear that people would find out I was a hypocrite, and that I would break my parents heart. But the temptations were so strong that soon these things were not strong enough motivations to keep me from wrong. I was set on going my own way and I was headed for destruction. The thoughts of my heart were wicked continually. God began working in my heart and began to convict me of my sin.
About this time I went to Camp Benaiah in Ingham, like I had every year since I was ten. My parents hadn't made me go and I only went because my friends were going. My whole motivation for going to camp was to show everyone how cool I was. Just before I got on the bus for our three-hour trip, God convicted me about this. I bowed my head in the church carpark and asked God to speak to me at camp. I had been at camp a day when God convicted me of being a phony. I sat in a secluded spot, just God and I alone. It was there that I told the Lord that I had sinned. I repented of my sins that day and life has been different ever since. From that day on I was a new creature. Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new. 2 Corinthians 5:17. I still struggled with my past sins but I didn't enjoy them anymore. I had a new motivation to do right. I was a redeemed child of God, and this is the greatest motivation. I began to show evidence of salvation in my life. I was growing in the Lord, and there were times when God was chastening me, and He only does that to His own children. I am now confident of my salvation. Praise the LORD!
When I got saved I was in a church that although it was Baptist in name, was not Baptist in doctrine. The pastor would even admit that he wasn’t a Baptist. So I had a lot of wrong teaching. Well when I turned eighteen, I moved out of my parents home for the last time. I had lived in and out of home since I was sixteen.
After a while I realized that in the church I was in I was in a spiritual rut. Through lack of discipleship I was still involved in many of my pre-salvation sins. So I moved about 900 kilometres south of where I was. It was not long after here that I found out I had no chance with the man that I thought I had loved for the past two years, and that I lost all my old friends in one fell swoop. I was devastated, because I could not see at the time that it was God breaking off old ties so that I could start anew. From sexual abuse as a small child to the way I was treated by boys and men as I grew up, I decided that all men were bad and went back to my sodomite lifestyle. It was at this time that I tried to take my own life for the last time. I had been suicidal all throughout my teenage years but this was the last time I attempted. Well the Lord delivered me from myself.
Not long after this, through a stupid choice I made, I became homeless. I lived in a shelter for homeless youth. I was there for three months. I see now that the Lord had me there to show me what He had delivered me from. It was about this time that God really began to work in my heart about living a separated life. Up until I moved to this new town, I had thought that separation was for fools that were afraid of the future. But I see now that the fool was me. I did get into trouble while living in the shelter, and yes, I was God’s child and so He began to discipline me. I did not enjoy getting into trouble like everyone else did. I was involved in things like lighting fires, graffiti, shoplifting and things of that nature. But I did not enjoy them. It was while I was in the shelter that I stopped doing this and decided that yes, the Lord had been good to me and I was serious about serving Him and I wanted to fully commit my life to Him.
Missionaries in my church took me in to their house when the homeless shelter kicked me out. It was at this time that I repented of sodomy and asked the missionaries to help me, and they did. They still let me live in their house knowing what a vile sinner I was. It was in my three months at their house and the few months afterwards when I moved into the college here in my town that the Lord began to reveal His plan to me. I had gotten my heart right while living in the shelter, and He was now ready to take me to the next step. God began to speak to my heart in very distinct ways, through preaching and music and many other things. I did not want to serve Him in a full time capacity. I just wanted a job and stability. I fought the Lord for a while. There is a song that I’ve heard before that is called “Lord, Please Don’t Send me to Africa.” That was me! I was afraid God was going to send me to Africa or some other remote place. Then one day I came to the end of myself and I told Him that I loved Him and would do whatever He wanted, even go to the centre of Africa, if He so desired. After I surrendered, He began to show me quite quickly what He wanted me to do. He laid a burden on my heart for the USA. I had never even desired to go to the USA. I thought that God was crazy and I didn’t want to go.
God did have a ministry for me in the USA. Through unusual means (I met my husband on the internet) He had me marry a man from the USA and my full time ministry is my husband and my children if God desires to bless us with them and I hope He will! God gave me a man that looks beyond my past and sees who I am today.
My husband is a wonderful man and I’m so glad the Lord saw fit to let me marry him. Jordan is a wonderful ministry to have! I get to serve my husband with joy and also get to serve as God sees fit in my local church.
The stories that I write a lot of them are things that I have personally seen or experienced or know someone who has experienced them.
What a wonderful change in my life has been wrought, since Jesus came into my heart!
~ Katy-Anne Wilson
(I write a lot of short stories so I kept the bit about the stories in there).