Post by juanitalynn on Apr 3, 2007 14:00:03 GMT -5
I have been to church on and off my whole life. When I was small, my mother took my brother & I to church. We went many years until I turned 13. Alot of the teenage boys at the church would give me a real hard time. They would even called me at home and say terrible things. That turned me away from church for awhile. My father was in the military, and so we moved to Germany acouple months later. I went to the local youth group meetings. But that didn't have the least effect on me. I was still smoking & drinking, and going to party's with GI's. This started when I was 13. I remember going to a youth retreat in the Black mountains of Germany. I remember sneaking out of my room to see the boys, got caught doing that, so I had to be watched closely. We went to preaching & I remember the preacher preaching about hell & how there were bed's of worms, & how they crawled all over you, and the fire & heat. It bothered me alittle bit, but when I started doing what I always did, it went away. When I was 19, I meet my husband. I was a very wild girl. Did what ever I wanted when ever I wanted. We dated 5 mth's before I found out I was pregnant & had STD's. My father wanted us to get married, so we did. The first two years were awful!! I tried to drink & do drugs to make it better, but it didn't work. One day, my husbands Aunt invited us to church. Brian wouldn't go, but I thought me & my daughter should go, so the church bus came and picked us up. We went to church on and off for 2 years. In 97 we started to go to church faithfully. We quit drinking, and partying, and everything else. We both thought we were OK, since we went to church 3 times a week. The next year, at bible school, on the last day, the preacher preached on hell. That fear came back...not sorrow, just the fear of hell. I didn't want to go to hell, so I went to the alter, and the preacher asked me if I needed to be saved & I said yes & repeated the prayer he said. And I thought I was OK, but inside, I still knew something wasn't quite right. In May of 2003, My husbands uncle was selling his mini van. We had seen him at a family Reunion. He invited us up to his house for the weekend, and there we could test drive the van. So we did. We weren't going to be leaving till Sunday, so we went to church with them. Everything was fine until the preacher started to preach. He was preaching on the women at the well. She though that she could hide the fact that she had 5 husbands & the man she was with wasn't even her husband. I was trying all that time to be something I wasn't. God showed me that day I was lost. It seemed the preacher was looking at me the whole time & preaching right to me. I felt that heaviness in my soul & a sickness in my stomach. It was heavy conviction. God showing me exactly what I was, I was so tried of the religion. I wanted Jesus, not just pretending I had him. When he called the alter call, I argued with myself, but I knew what I needed to do. I went to the alter & called out to God. No one had to lead me in a prayer. You can't pray wrong when your under conviction. That shame & the burden where lifted & it was a sense of relief & joy & couldn't explain. The preacher did come and talked to me & and prayed for me. It's amazing how he has changed my life since. How my mind changed so much, then everything else followed. My husband got saved in Nov. of that same year. Two years later he surrendered to preach. I still can't get over what he has done, and how we have grown & learned from His Word. How when I see I'm wrong from the Word of God, how His spirit bears witness with my spirit that it's right. My husband & I have a wonderful marriage. Thanks to His word in teaching what each of our roles in marriage are. I had so much pride, and it took alot of lessons in humility to get me were I am now. Who would have ever thought 15 years ago that I would be a preachers wife. ;D