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Post by juanitalynn on Apr 25, 2007 9:24:15 GMT -5
I don't think anyone said not to support it. I also said i liked it except for those parts, it's just not the way my husband and i act. He's not that type of person that would say that. If your husband was to ever say something like that to you, would it offend you? I know some men do not said or do things like that because they feel there wifes would be offended. Would you be willing to please him in ANY way? ? Would you suprise him and be that way yourself. I don't know a man in the world that would not enjoy it. They were created like that. It's scriptural. It's is our love and duty towards our husbands to fulfill there's needs before they even know they have that need. ;D
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Post by chelsie on May 16, 2007 21:54:33 GMT -5
I have this book. My Mom gave it to me shortly after I got married. She had just read it herself and said she wished she had read it before she was married...and she wished I had too. But as it was I got it in the start of our marraige, Praise The Lord! Now...to apply it more often...
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Post by mamatoarose on Sept 22, 2007 19:53:34 GMT -5
I just got created to be his help meet not to long ago. I have been wanting this book for a long time. What a blessing it has been! I love it. I even put off reading the excellent wife until I have this one finished up. I have been a slow reader here lately. I am looking forward to finishing it up this week. It has really just helped me better be a better wife. I tell you it really has pointed out some faults in me that I know definately need changing! I think it is one of those books that I will love re-reading.
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tbhas6
Senior Member
Posts: 1,146
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Post by tbhas6 on Sept 23, 2007 19:43:48 GMT -5
I've read "Created To Be His Helpmeet" twice. The first time I read the book the Lord convicted me of my worldly, selfish, rebellious attitude - in the past I always tried to submit to my husband, but only because the Bible said to - I submitted with attitude (that equals disobedience). The second time I read it, I read it with prayer. Asking our Lord to show me how to change my attitude in ways that would be pleasing to Him.
This book has been the best blessing for our marriage and my happiness. We always had friction in our marriage - not because I didn't submit, but because I had an unbiblical attitude about it. With guidence from the Lord's word and applying principles from this book, many positive changes have occurred within me. My marriage has improved beyond any thing I could have ever imagined. Our children are more content than ever before. We are at last HAPPILY married ... tb
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Post by mamatoarose on Sept 29, 2007 21:35:57 GMT -5
Love your posts tb:)
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keeperofthehome
Senior Member
"The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her...She will do him good & not evil..."
Posts: 840
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Post by keeperofthehome on Nov 10, 2007 11:21:24 GMT -5
I just got the book last month and I will say...at any other point in my marriage I probably wouldn't have bothered to read it. But GOD'S perfect timing placed it in my hands at the exact moment I needed it. HE always knows better than us what we need and when. Without going into details, I will just say this...my marriage was on the edge of being over. I began to read and soak up the words in this book. I read and ate the words as if they were food I hadn't had in ages. My marital spirit was starving for godly impartation from a Christian wife who would actually follow the command written in the Bible (Titus 2). Since reading the book I was convicted of my selfish carnal ways. Submission to me was not something I really wanted any part of. The worldly ways had polluted me to what it really meant. I was not going to be a door mat for any man, not my husband or anyone. So submission was not part of my vocabulary. But once Debi Pearl and the Holy Spirit opened my eyes to what Biblical submission truly is...wow! My world was rocked. I began to put into practice some of the things she wrote as well as what the LORD directed for me personally in my marriage. You know what? I can honestly & truthfully tell you that we have such a better marriage than we ever did before. When I began to use the tools that the Holy Spirit gave me .. I can't tell you the wonderful changes it has brought about in me and my marriage. For the first time, I finally feel like I am in my "place." I don't want anyone to take this the wrong way. But what I mean by this is that I feel like I am in my place as the wife GOD called me to be for my husband. When I was doing things "my way" and not the way GOD designed I always felt out of place (no matter how much I tried to make the pieces fit.)
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tbhas6
Senior Member
Posts: 1,146
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Post by tbhas6 on Nov 10, 2007 17:38:15 GMT -5
Keeperofthehome,
Praise the Lord! I also have a similar testimony after reading "Created To Be His Help Meet" . It wasn't that I didn't submit to my husband, I submitted with the wrong attitude (resentment, bitterness, self-pitty). Which in turn, caused the same type of friction as not submitting at all. Once I repented and put some new behaviors into practice, my marriage improved 110%, literally overnight! Although I don't subscribe to some of the doctrine's of the Pearl's church, the Lord has really used thier books "Created To Be His Help Meet" and "To Train Up A Child" to minister to me and my family. I am so very thankful the Lord brought them my way ... tb
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Post by quasimodo on Nov 10, 2007 18:49:32 GMT -5
I read this book and was blessed to a certain degree by it, however, because I don't necessarily agree with what the Pearl's teach, I do not recommend it. I don't mean to offend by what I said, I just have a hard time supporting the Pearl's books all the time. I realize that the context that we are speaking is "keeper sisters" and the topic is ministering to women in their marriages. This book does have its good points.
There are plenty of other good books for women like: Intimate Issues and Intimacy Ignited, both by Dillow and Pintus, Sheet Music by Kevin Leman, the Act of Marriage by the LaHaye's, and Intended for Pleasure by Ed Wheat (I think?). Those are well-balanced books and are also full of scripture.
This is a really great topic because I've noticed that wives in general have viewed sex as a chore, rather than a blessing, as Sister Michelle (and others) have mentioned. It is to our advantage to be able to share candidly (not details, of course) about what the word says regarding sex. It's healthy, it's beautiful and it is to be enjoyed by both man AND wife! Great topic, ladies!
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tbhas6
Senior Member
Posts: 1,146
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Post by tbhas6 on Nov 10, 2007 19:25:40 GMT -5
Regarding Created To Be His Help Meet, I reply again just so that other ladies reading my posts on the subject realize that my recommendation has nothing to do with submission in the physical intimacy arena. Intimacy Issues for Women, Intimacy Ignited are great books for anyone needing that type of advice.
If I ever feel led to suggest that someone read Created To Be His Help Meet, it is not because improved physical intimacy will magically improve one's marriage. Submitting to your husband as you would submit to Christ is the key to an improved marriage, not wild bedroom activity. For instance, would I ever think, "Oh darn! Christ is going to be here in 30 minutes. I wish he'd get stuck in a traffic jam so that I'd have more time for ______________." ? Of course not! I'd be on pins and needles with expectation - He couldn't arrive soon enough. Would I refuse to occasionally cook Christ's favorite meal, no matter how much I hated it or how unhealthy it was for Him? Of course not! I would take cooking lessons from his mother so that I could prepare it EXACTLY the way He likes it. If Christ loved to see me in yellow dresses, would I refuse to wear them because I look washed out in yellow? Absolutely not! I'd wear yellow everyday of the week, no matter how awful I looked, if it's what Christ wanted from me. Would I talk down to Him or insult Him whenever He came up with some crazy, nonsensical idea? No way! I go along and enjoy the ride.
Dealing with physical intimacy issues is not the primary theme of this book. The primary theme is loving, submitting to, honoring and caring for your husband as you would if he were Christ.
Thank you for your time, ... tb
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Post by quasimodo on Nov 10, 2007 19:29:22 GMT -5
Wow, tb, I'm sorry to have offended you. You seem upset, and I didn't intend that. The direction of the conversation seemed to go that way, and so I suggested those books in response to those.
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tbhas6
Senior Member
Posts: 1,146
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Post by tbhas6 on Nov 10, 2007 20:09:40 GMT -5
Hey Quasimodo,
No need to apologize - I'm not at all offended. I am sorry my response had that tone - that certainly was not my intent. I was only pointing out the manner in which the Lord convicted my attitude towards my own husband ... tb
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keeperofthehome
Senior Member
"The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her...She will do him good & not evil..."
Posts: 840
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Post by keeperofthehome on Nov 10, 2007 23:45:58 GMT -5
TB~ I agree with you on the aspect that the book is based on loving, caring, and submitting to our husbands. The Holy Spirit used this particular book to convict me of my selfishness in my marriage and in myself. Quasi~ I appreciate your recommendations on the other books for those that feel the sexual aspect of marriage is a concern for them. I agree with TB, intimacy is and was not my conviction it was clearly my selfishness and lack of submission period to my husband that this book helped enlighten me on. I do appreciate the board's diverse views on this book. It's like my dad always said "not all tables do you get fed at." He was referring to Churches. Not every Church meets every person's needs. And just like the different denominations feed certain people and their spiritual needs (not one Church can meet everyone's needs), this book may not feed every marriage's submission needs. We just have to learn to be led by the Holy Spirit and let Him show us what we need. Some of us were shown this book as that was the food that we needed. Some may have needed only the desert of it and some (like me needed the meat and potatoes of the book. (I hope this makes sense.) I respect each person's opinion on the book as well as opinions on everything in general. That's what makes the world a place of variety. *grin*
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Post by quasimodo on Nov 11, 2007 9:25:45 GMT -5
Hi Nichole and tb,
Sure, I understand completely what is being said here. I grew through the "other stuff" of the book versus the sexual aspect of it as well....which is why I recommended something different for that.
As far as the the lack of submission and the selfishness issues, I did like the way that Debi's POV was one-sided...meaning that she spoke to the woman only and not of the man's job ("he should be doing _______, or he should be __________). I really appreciate that, however, I think that it's definitely hard to swallow, but how wonderful when we do. I'm glad you ladies have learned through the book.
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Post by lisamarie on Aug 10, 2008 10:15:35 GMT -5
I know this was an old post, but I feel like sharing my thoughts on it. I have read the book. A few times actually. I love it. I know how a lot of you feel, like she is expecting perfection on our part. Debi Pearl is not perfect nor are we. What works for her home may not work for ours. She is giving her view of the scriptures. If you really read it with an opened mind you will see how amazing of a woman she is and strive to use her principles for your home. At first reading the book I found it hard to believe she has only disagreed with her husband out loud a couple times. I am sure we all do that in a days time. But that is what works for her. I believe that she is the closest person that I know or have read that uses the scriptures literally and applies them to her life. We all pretty much pick and choose to our satisfaction and we argue with our husbands. There is not always a happy loving home with all of us I am sure. I feel there is with the Pearl's.
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